reasons why rfg is the coolest and the weight gain involved with it is NOT.

Brace yourselves for a looooong but interesting (I promise! Ok I don't, but there are treats at the end!  If you are one of those people that considers pictures the equivalent of treats) post:

So remember this post from last year? RFG (Retreat for Girls) changes lives - mostly mine. And anything I post on here will not do it justice so feel free to go here and here for more info. K cool.  

But it really has been an incredible couple of weeks in which I worked part-time as a head counselor (with my little partner in crime Spike! see: blonde babe up above) and full-time as a walking panic attack.   I mean probably - I felt like I was in a lack-of-sleep-induced spiritual high in which I can't really recall details of the week, but it was a really challenging (yet fulfilling!!) opportunity.  Because I was in a different role than I was last year (last year, I had my own groups of girls and this year I acted as a counselor to the counselors) it really gave me some good time to reflect on my growth over the past year. 

Like, honestly.  I would literally throw last year's version of myself down a set of stairs.  Because I feel like so much of me has changed.  Fist pump!  Go, refiner's fire!  And I love RFG for that very reason.  It is constantly bettering (so I guess that IS in fact a word because there aren't any red squigglies under it? I thought I made it up...) me and it is all in thanks to the Lord, obviously, and also the amazing counselors!

ready for this?

back row, left to right: bug, frosting, mamba, frenchie, pember, shuffle, serenity, ricki, beffy, barney
back row, left to right: mango, JOLIE, spaz, road runner (ra ra), belle, sunshine, m&m, giggles, spike

so now you have a list of baby names. you're welcome. 

giggles                                                                       spike                                                                                       shuffle   

Aren't we cute?  

And now commence...a story describing the most random night of my life:

As true to RFG tradition (er...a tradition of one year, that is), we stopped by Texas Roadhouse after the first session ended on Friday evening.  Just for some good old fashioned fun.  Which quickly escalated into a birthday party.  FOR ME. I know, my birthday was well over a month ago, but hey, I'm a roll-with-the-punches kind of gal.  When someone tells me it's my birthday, gosh darn it they're right.  Now where is my free cake, people?!

And it wouldn't be a birthday if a man wasn't involved, am I right? 

No. No, I definitely could have gone without the man.  See, here's what happened.  After I got sung a little birthday diddy, homeboy two tables down decided it was his birthday too.  Suuuuure. I'm on to you, buddy. 

It really was his birthday. His 28th, we later found out. Woops?

So after his birthday is celebrated by the workers of Texas Roadhouse (a big yeeeeeeeee-haw! included), the girls at my table start chanting BIRTHDAY KISS! BIRTHDAY KISS!  And he waltzes over to my table and lays one on me. Just to clarify, it looks like my hand is grabbing onto his shirt in a "I think you're sexy get your body closer to mine" type of grasp. No no. It was just an awkward arm.  Very dinosaur-like, really. 

And that is how a not-22 year old (he lied to me) kissed me on my not 21st (I lied to them) birthday.  And now I would like to start a charity called "Christina will no longer be the victim of hate crimes.  Unless free birthday cake is involved."

And now let's talk about real the issue at hand. 

This year, I was determined to make some lifestyle changes while up in Logan. Namely, cutting out Diet Coke.  Remember that refiner's fire I was talking about earlier?? Yeah, this is where it came into play. Oh well and also...I guess I did a lot of work spiritually too.  But let's focus on my DC problem.  I did in fact only have one soda the entire time I was at Retreat.  But does that mean I lost weight? 

Absolutely not. Despite the miles of walking I did each day.  

To make myself feel better, at the end of the second session, I compiled a list.  

Reasons I Still Haven't Lost All the Weight I Said I Would Back In May:

:: I'm big boned?

:: I can't afford a new wardrobe.

:: It's been too hot - WAY too hot - to run. On the treadmill. Inside the gym.

:: So...donuts.

:: And also Taco Bell.

:: It's all muscle weight, I swear. Lots of lean muscle. Right on my abs. And my inner thighs.  

:: Sometimes, I give myself a "free day" (binge day - you know).  Sometimes, my "free day" turns into "free days" which then turns into "free weekends."  And by sometimes I definitely mean "every time a week contains a Friday, followed by a Saturday then a Sunday." So that's cool.

:: Elephantitis. Probably. 

Ok ok enough talking. Here are some pictures of my favorite ladies to send you on your way!

I love this picture very much because it includes Katie (far right) and Anita (far left) - and they are honest to goodness some of my heroes. I love these women!

Aaaaaaand here'e the treat you were promised! 

Yaaaaaaaaay. 

spike, jolie, bigdawgdaddy and frosting.  

it wouldn't be a proper sunday unless my phone got hijacked during sunday school. am i right?? 

Here's the thing about Sundays. 

 I end up sleeping for the majority of the day, which leads to a sluggish, lazy afternoon/evening. Yes, sometimes oversleeping and getting too many zzz's has the same effect as not getting enough – turning you into a tired, unproductive bump on a log.

Choosing between the wide arrays of your favorite movies (or, just, movies in general because let's be honest - The Family Stone is NO ONE'S favorite movie...right?) being shown all over cable/satellite television. Braveheart is on TNT, Kardashians is on E!, Titanic is on FX, Mean Girls is on TBS, Freedom Writers is on MTV, Home Alone is on ABC Family and your fingers are getting an intense workout, flipping between multiple channels. It requires far too much thinking and decision making for a Sunday, but it’s a good problem to have. Have you ever gone from “Four for you Glen Coco!” to “I'll never let go, Jack!"? I have. 

Dealing with the fact that Sunday is your absolute last chance to re-coup (is that a word? do you know what i'm trying to say here? re-coop? that just looks wrong) is such a hard thing.  Like, I want to lay on the living room floor all day yet get everything done before the week starts and also eat a lot but I don't want to feel obese and I want to go on a walk because I'm getting cabin fever but I don't want to go out into civility...please tell me I'm not the only one with these issues.  

If for nothing else, Sunday is good for taking selfies during church or a series of the same basic shot outside while still in nice clothing (cause, like, let's be real - as soon as I get home, I am putting on the comfiest clothes known to man. Except not because I hope no man ever sees my outfits on Sunday afternoons).  

However, today had some major high-points ---

:: pad thai made by papa smith

::major roommate bonding time (aka all of us sleeping in the same room)

::cookie baking, accompanied by learning how to twerk. or trying.

::a spontaneous, harmless prank pulled on jennae and jordan. like, it wasn't our best work, but mimi and i were feeling a little wired up so we...wait for it...turned off the power in the living room.  but none of the surrounding rooms? that was an amateur move. woops. we'll getcha next time!!!

Happy napping!  Here's to many, many more Sundays like today.

ox/C

a weenie roast

On Wednesday night, while we were all sitting around our apartment, Jordan and Mimi started talking about weenie roasts - something I had never heard of before but quickly became a fan of.  Three seconds later, we were off the couch and out the door (in our best outfits, obvi).  

And...

COMMENCE SUMMER.  

--------

ox/C

Saturday night I got together with some friends for little tinfoil dinners (which we have mastered, by the way) and double date action. Us girls sat and chatted on the tree logs while the boys did manly stuff like start fires and carry around big sticks for no particular reason. 

Just kidding. But it was a fun night in which we told scary stories and bonded up at Squaw Peak. Sans kissing.  

i know these pictures are hard to see - just for clarification, i am NOT proposing in the picture on the right.

Yesterday was Jennae's birthday!  And our little Mimi girl made it back just on time for a celebratory dinner at Pizza Pie Cafe to ring in the big 2-1!!!  And even though we didn't get drunk, it was such a fun night. 

Recently, with all this birthday activity going on in our apartment, I've come to realize something. I love celebrating other's birthdays, but when it comes to my own, it's a weird phenomenon. I stopped caring about my birthday after I came to college. And I don’t mean, “OMG, I don’t care but I really do actually. You better give me presents and cake.” No, I legitimately don’t care. It’s whatevs. I just want my parents to give me a Trader Joe’s gift card (or any form of money, really) and to maybe make out with someone at my party (jokes!! kind of).  It sounds depressing but it’s not. It’s actually a relief. But this year, all this birthday commotion has been SO FUN!! I love being with by bestie boos celebrating and having the time of our lives. 

And it was so fun to focus the attention on this little lady and bond with all our friends over how much we love her. 

her fan club (i love these boys)!

the girls of ct 29 are back in business! 

guess who's backkkkk?

sorry we're models. 

highlights of the week[end]

---------------

:: "Summer 2010. We went hard." "We don't want to hear that..."

:: Monster's University. Like, OMG. Can I please transfer schools? 

:: People not responding to messages that I know were sent/read.  Please, take a second to write me back so that I can move on with my day, not worrying that you and everybody else in the world hates my parents for having me. 

:: Somebody told me that if you left your eye makeup on at night after cleaning your face, you'd wake up looking beautiful (she says she had to learn all these tricks after getting married because she wanted to look cute in the morning waking up next to her husband). 

I'd say looking like a zombie would have been more accurate. At least in my case. (pictures to follow. maybe). 

ox/C

- - - - - - - - - -

See that water bottle that I'm holding up there? Your not-so-averagely-sized Smart Water bottle? Yeah. Let me tell you. That's not [smart] water in there.  Before going to work yesterday afternoon, I almost completely filled that thing with Dr. Pepper.  

Worst. Decision. Ever. 

After spending a long day in the sun, I was tired and dehydrated (so obviously DP was the proper refresher) and seeing that 2-liter bottle in the fridge at Little Ceasar's (oh so I also ate a lot of pizza yesterday) felt a lot like seeing the face of God and having Him wink at me. 

One hour later (I imagine myself saying this in the voice of the narrator from Spongebob): I was shaky and so full - especially after Bombay House takeout with my dad (stop judging my eating habits!!) - , unhappily knowing that I was going to feel generally gross the rest of the day/evening, as my stomach had now distended to twice its normal dimensions with a screeching food baby.  

So when I woke up this morning, excited to have achieved a normal heart rate again, I went downstairs to fill up my water bottle (with water this time) before heading off to work. Then I saw the remainder of the 2-liter bottle of DP. And I swigged those last few drops (tablespoons...cups?).  Basically, I'm the worst at being healthy.  Bikini body what??

 

p.s. People still Tinder??

we all have to find validation somewhere, right? thanks bobby.

oh p.p.s. i CANNOT stop listening to John Legend (So High and Everybody Knows) and Mumford & Sons (After the Storm and Home). suuuuuch good feel-good-wrapped-up-in-your-sheets-trying-to-avoid-finals music. among other things.

cheers to the freakin weekend.

Let me first start off by saying that this girl did so much to make my birthday weekend so awesome!  And so full of surprises.  Remember A?  Well earlier in the week, that cute boy asked if he could take me out for a birthday dinner on Friday night, the day before my birthday.  After a yummy meal, he mentioned that we had to swing by my apartment to grab a movie we had rented the night before but never got around to watching (you know, the movie Mama? spoiler alert: NOT scary. or good, even.)  

Now, I'll admit, I was in a world of my own, having a great night with the boy I liked and couldn't get enough of that week, so anything could have gotten past me, really. But mostly, I have really great friends that are good at keeping secrets.  A and I walked in my front door and we were greeted by my most favorite people in the world. So I screamed. And cried.  Mostly because I was so touched by all the effort that was put into it.  I've never ever had a surprise party!  And Jennae got to work as soon as I left the apartment for dinner and made such a beautiful Minni-style cake I couldn't help but make room for it even after stuffing myself at dinner (*sidenote: A was so tricky about this, he even suggested we get dessert at the restaurant, full knowing I wouldn't end up ordering anything. or maybe he was just stalling?  Again, anything could have gotten by me, I swear. If you have ever wanted to swindle me into giving you loads of cash, you missed your chance cause that would have been the perfect night).  And her trusty side-kick Jeff Dunn (swoon I love that boy!!) was there to clean our entire apartment.  I'm so so thankful for such great friends.  

Saturday, I went on a beautiful bike ride with Papa Smith and good ol' Mikey Smith to Kneader's, after getting a very tearful phone call from my sweet mom about how sad she was that she couldn't be there.  I am just so very much obsessed with my family.  Then, Jennae and I spent a glorious 4 hours at 7 Peaks, which included:

:: way too much bumping & grinding in the lazy river

:: hot dogs, hamburgers, and fries. oh, and DP. need i say more?

:: a completely flat tube that we took on a ride anyways

:: spying on all the hot rugby players (and their teeny tiny blond wives. i hate myself so much right now)

Then Jennae treated me (yes, treated me!! where did this girl come from??) to a pedicure, after which we hit up our favorite restaurant: Chili's. Bottomless chips and salsa for #lyfe.  We ended the day by getting together with the boys to grace the Orem Days carnival with our presence.  Two hours and a firework show later, I was a happy camper (even the Ferris Wheel was fun - how could it not be if a boy was there to hold my hand and kiss me at the top??) and was ready to hit the sack.

So obvi, it was the perfect weekend to top off the perfect week (movies in the park, cuddling, basketball games, scooter rides, tanning, and everything else summer).  

Here is where the post turns into your basic sad-girl-sob-story.  So feel free to stop reading, k? Cool.

I think that this post did a mediocre job at expressing just how great my week was  - beginning to end.  After spending the last weekend in Seattle, I came back so so excited to reunite with A!  I had been thinking about him all weekend, even though we had just barely started to rekindle our flame (ew I'm embarrassed I wrote that phrase down - who am I??) right before I left for Washington.  We spent the majority of Tuesday morning and then the afternoon together.  He invited me to a movie at the park on Wednesday night, during which we cuddled and laughed and bonded. We both kept saying, "This is so fun! This is so summer-y! Look at us having a summer fling and being so cute about it!" Ok so we didn't say all those things, but I think we were both thinking it. I hope?  After the movie, we went back to my place and bonded with Jennae as she went through a dramatic ordeal with a boy.  As I drove him home that night, we kissed and I felt so so happy!  Before getting out of the car, he said, "Hey, I think I'd really like to date you." I got major butterflies. My life was so perfect! Summer was starting! I had a boy!

Each time I was with him, I liked him more and more.  Never have I been with a guy who not only wants to talk about anything and everything - from games of MASH to the most controversial subjects - but appreciates and encourages my opinion.  I loved getting into a conversation with him because it meant I had a chance to analyze!

The strange thing about all of this was the timing: our fling was kickstarted by a random night, after months of platonic friendship, of watching a movie. In which we cuddled.  And had a grand old time. And wanted to keep being together?  In the weeks leading up to this, and in the days during it, I kept having this thought: "I am ok being single right now because I want to be the best I can be for the next guy that comes into my life."  As much as I wanted a boyfriend, I also wanted to become better, in all aspects of my life - physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally - so I could attract the absolutely best person I could.  Yet I just couldn't shake the strong feelings I had for A!  It was so fun to be his, to always have fun plans, to get random yet validating texts or calls throughout the day, just pure fun.  It just felt right - I could continue my quest to better myself while I was with him! Yeah!

Then.  On Sunday night, after not talking to each other much throughout our busy day, he came over to say hi.  We chatted, laughed, and held hands for a few seconds.  After about 20 minutes, he sat on the edge of the couch, looking ready to leave.  I told him that if he was feeling tired, he could go home and we could see each other later!  He looked at me and said, "Ok I think I will. But first, I have to tell you something that happened on Saturday that made me sad."  He stated that He had woken up on Saturday morning, feeling really happy about the night before that we had spent together (oh my gosh NO not together, just for the evening!) and went to the Temple.  Where he had a recurring feeling that he wasn't supposed to be dating me right now. Which sucks because he really likes me.

I should be fine with this!

Two weeks ago we were talking about our respective dating lives..to each other!

I wasn't even looking for a boyfriend!

We weren't even serious.

But it hurt.  I started crying. We hugged, and I told him to go home.  There wasn't much else to say? He walked out the door and I crashed on the couch and bawled. I'm serious, guys, bawled. I got so swept up in all the emotions and I couldn't help it. I'm sure my roommates were upstairs so confused at the hysterical freak downstairs (ok, it wasn't that bad, but...you know).  Part of me wanted to hear a knock on the door and he would come back inside and we would start our whole night over, sans tears.  Now the worst part is, we won't be talking or seeing each other, at least for a while.  For good reason - I understand everything he said and it was impossible to even be a little mad about it.

At this point I have successfully ventured through my depressed phase. I have stopped at the bakery near my office and bought donuts and chocolate milk (because I deal with my emotions like a 5 year old) and I am now angry (mainly because I know I am going to have to run a lot to work off those donuts and chocolate milk).

And I am definitely not staring at my phone, wondering if and when he will text me, because that is something that lovelorn teenage girls do, and while I might still be in the final throes of teendom I will not be a slave to cliches.  And I am not thinking about our summer list full of bike rides, block parties, movies in the park.

Ok so I am!  Give me a couple days, guys. I'll be fine.  And now I have all the time in the world to become a better person!  Tiny fist pump.

the land of the green.

So, I'll admit it. I loved Eat, Pray, Love.  In fact, dare I say it is one of my favorite books?  For a while in high school, I was proud of this because I thought it was cool to like it - you know, kind of a trendy feminism kick.  Then, everyone started hating on it post-movie production and so I kind of let my love go by the wayside.  But ti's weekend like this past one that make me remember why I love that book - traveling is the BOMB.  Seattle was teh perfect weekend escape to get my hippie side all excited.  Quitting my job sudenly seemed very reasonable as long as I could sub in as some activist-movement guru barista that lived in a lfat with musician roommates that explored liberal ideas and never showered.  It sounds pretty poetic, don't you think?  No? Ok let's move on then. 

I had such a great weekend with these people.  We went to Seattle to send Seth's brother Tanner (the biggest, best boy around) off on his mission to Ghana (oh the hilarity of the puns that ensued), but we found ourselves having the time of our lives playing in the big city!  After arriving on Friday afternoon - delayed because of a flat tire which landed us in a darling little town in Oregon - and playing wiffle (is that even how you spell it?) ball and barbecuing with the family, we spent all day Saturday in the city.  I had been to Seattle multiple times, but this trip provided some new experiences:

:: a rally - picket signs, megaphones and a large crowd included - against Istanbul (or Turkey? I never did find out) in which we performed a more Turkish version of Everybody's Shufflin (they were going for a more political stance by yelling the name of a communist leader Chapulin - but could care less). we were filmed, even though we yelled comments like, "who are we fighting for again?" and "boycott thanksgiving - no turkey allowed!"  

:: a Ferris Bueller-type adventure in which we tried to get to the top of a skyscraper, but failed after being called "kids." i am NOT a child. i went to the doctor by myself once, ok??

:: making friends on public transportation?? what a thrill - i was pumped to go out and make new buds all over the city!

:: sleeping in a "haunted" house.  

:: clam chowder. that's all. 

And now here is a photo dump on the whole experience: 

we love tanner!!

photo shoots - per usual! 

ox/C